Most Outrageous / Funniest Thing a Coach Has Done

[cthomas]

In an attempt to add some levity to our dire situation, I would like to know some of the funniest or most outrageous things a coach you have played for has done. I know many of you have participated in athletics in high school or college and there must be some great stories. I played a little basketball in high school back in the mid-60's and remember an incident after particularly bad half. We got to the locker room and after about five minutes the coach walked in, threw a Kotex on the floor and walked out without saying a word. Needless to say, we got the message! I don't remember much about my high school basketball days, but that sticks with me even after 50 some years.

[BGleas]

I'm #22 in white.

Thread over, drops mic...

[theriverpilot]

My senior year of football in 1987 pre-season, our coach is trying to fire us up and get a better attitude about the upcoming season.  We went 0-9 the previous year.  So he brings in a boom box and gets ready to play a song to "fire us up" for the season.  So what fist-pumping, fired up song does he play for the team?  Patti LaBell "New Attitude".  I kid you not.  Yep, we went 0-9 that year too.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWfZ5SZZ4xE

[Hovadipo]

Had my coach's wife take off her heels and cross the basketball court to scream at the old man yelling things at our bench once. The same night, that coach put a basketball-sized dent in a metal locker with his head.


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[Hovadipo]

Also, fantastic thread idea. Excited to see where this goes.


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[BlueDevil]

My senior year in baseball we had just lost to Huntington North at home and were getting our asses chewed out in left field. The team was facing our storage shed and the garage door was wide open. While getting our asses chewed all of us were dying laughing and coach couldn't figure out why and was hot. Well inside of the garage was another coach completely obliterating a trash can with a bat and yelling obscenities.


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[TheWatShot]

Not a coach, but a pitcher on my school's baseball team once got taken out of a game after sucking, and proceeded to punch the concrete wall in the dugout (with his pitching hand). 

 

He didn't pitch again that season. 

[Alford Bailey]

This just happened a couple weeks ago. Sons 5th grade team was playing another local school. Game is back and forth and both teams are pretty physical. We are down one and a kid hit a putback at the buzzer for the win. After celebrating everyone lines up for handshakes.The opposing coach begins to tear in to our coach cussing and carrying on. Our coach doesnt say a word. Meanwhile an opposing parent comes out of the stands and says something to our coach. Our coach looks at the parent and asks "did you just come out of the stands?" Parent says yes and our coach says"ok Im gonna knock you out first" and raises his fist and is promptly tackled by the AD and refs. Turns out it had nothing to do with the basketball game. Other coach was still pissed about a travel league baseball game last summer, lol.

[JSHoosier]

1 hour ago, TheWatShot said:

Not a coach, but a pitcher on my school's baseball team once got taken out of a game after sucking, and proceeded to punch the concrete wall in the dugout (with his pitching hand). 

 

He didn't pitch again that season. 

Was it Kevin Brown?  Because Kevin Brown did that.

Actually, I think Brown was stupid enough to punch the wall with his pitching hand.

[Alford Bailey]

3 hours ago, BGleas said:

I'm #22 in white.

Thread over, drops mic...

I really like that guy!

[Crimson and Cream]

Back in the day a group of my friends used to play at the local Y together and one of the dad's was our coach. I kid you not the man would be drenched in sweat before our game even started. We're talking about a YMCA league. It was quite a scene.

[BGleas]

42 minutes ago, Alford Bailey said:

I really like that guy!

The funny part (other than the quick hands comment) was the next day at practice we were all waiting in the film room on pins and needles for how he was going to address the situation. We didn't know if he'd be suspended, if some of us were going to be suspended (despite what the TV guys said, there were punches thrown). 

He walks in and paces back and forth for about 20 seconds, then just looks up and says "fellas, the only thing I have to say about last night is, I should have taken the charge". 

Everyone just died laughing. 

[Alford Bailey]

3 minutes ago, BGleas said:

The funny part (other than the quick hands comment) was the next day at practice we were all waiting in the film room on pins and needles for how he was going to address the situation. We didn't know if he'd be suspended, if some of us were going to be suspended (despite what the TV guys said, there were punches thrown). 

He walks in and paces back and forth for about 20 seconds, then just looks up and says "fellas, the only thing I have to say about last night is, I should have taken the charge". 

Everyone just died laughing. 

Nothing happened?

[BGleas]

2 minutes ago, Alford Bailey said:

Nothing happened?

We had one player get suspended a game for throwing a punch, nothing happened to our coach. As you can probably tell he was kind of old (was his 29th or 30th season and he retired at the end of the season) so he was sort of the "Dean" of coaches in the conference, so we all assumed he negotiated his way out of a suspension by having one of our bench guys take a game for the punch. 

[cthomas]

5 hours ago, BGleas said:

I'm #22 in white.

Thread over, drops mic...

Classic in a Woody Hayes sort of way. I loved his explanation. I just knew there had to be some good stuff out there. The funny thing is that when you are young you just kinda accept things and don't think about it too much.

[HoosierAloha]

My junior year of high school I tried out for the golf team. I had tried out the year before but didn't make it.

The first day we were on the course for tryouts I was standing on the tee. I was extremely nervous with 30+ peers and coaches within view.

As I was waiting for the foursome in the fairway to clear I suddenly was 6 feet off the ground upside down with the golf coach yelling "what are you going to do?!!" I was trying to figure out what had just taken place and the coach continued to scream "what are you going to do?!!"

I managed to eek out a "what just happened?" The coach once again responded with a "what are you going to do?!!"

He placed me back on my feet and described in detail what "5 on 2" meant and how to execute it.

I had heard stories of how he was a cool coach and a bit whacky. Before I even had the chance to play for him, I found out the stories were true. He did manage to settle my nerves and I had a pretty solid round.

[HoosierCoop]

19 hours ago, BGleas said:

I'm #22 in white.

Thread over, drops mic...

Way to stop the ball Gleas!  We need that defense for IU  :)

[Stuhoo]

I'm #22 in white.

Thread over, drops mic...

There's a guy that NEVER would have been steamrolled by Mo Freakin' Wagner.

[HoosierCoop]

When I was in 8th Grade, we were playing the first game of our conference tournament.  We had only 2 losses going into this thing and opened the game with the worst 1st half that we had played all season.  I was benched after the first quarter for taking to many ill-advised shots (ha!).  During half-time he was so mad that he slammed his clipboard against the locker.  The part that broke off hit his face and he had to get 6 stitches.  It was all that we could do not to laugh (which is when it is the hardest).  We went on to win the game and the conference.  Our principal actually stepped in to coach and did a really good job!  We joked about it for years after.  I still call him "coach" to this day.

[BGleas]

1 hour ago, HoosierCoop said:

Way to stop the ball Gleas!  We need that defense for IU  :)

Haha, don't give me too much credit, the kid still got off a great look. 

The other crazy thing about that play is that our coach spent the entire timeout before the play telling #4 not go go for the steal on the inbounds pass and to just keep the ball in front (there was only 4 seconds left and we were up 1), and what did he do? He went for the steal which allowed the other team to get all the way down court and get a great shot off.